Day 182: Letter to Sam...

Wow, sweetheart!

Hard to believe you came into my life 24 years ago today.  Can't believe it's been that long yet it seems just like yesterday when the doctor asked me, "do you want to see your daughter?" 

I remember looking down on you in the delivery room and you looked so peaceful, so serene.  I remember the curve of your eye lashes and your little up turned nose.  It's the same thing I would look at each and every night of your life as I would check in on you.  Yeah, even when you hit your teens I would steal a quick peek to make sure you were ok and I would see that same peaceful look on your face.  It was the one thing that would always turn a bad day into something special.

Over the years I've seen you grow into a beautiful and amazing woman.  I've seen you struggle through some hardships, emerging through it all stronger, more resilient and more determined to succeed.  You've endured a lot and yet you possess such an inner strength, such confidence that you are willing to take life by the horns to see where it will take you.

I always look forward to our chats about what's going on in our lives but I will say that the old memories of the things we've shared I replay often in my mind which always warms my heart.  I won't embarrass you by retelling some of the silly things we've shared but I will say they are the fondest moments in my life. 

As a child many years ago, I knew deep down inside I always wanted to be a father and I knew that I always wanted a daughter.  Someone who could capture my heart and make me smile even on my darkest days.  Every day I thank God who has truly blessed me with an angel.  You have been and always will be the most important woman in my life.  I'm so proud of you and no father could love his daughter more.

Happy Birthday, Samantha!

I love you,

Dad

Day 181: Ax Man...

The sound of a home owner trying to cut down large tree branches hanging over into his yard...

 

"Futher mudruker, son of a bitch, gat damn, filthin foul, suck balls, blow me, butt wad lickin', sack o'dung sniffin', pole dancin', whatha funk, kiss my lily white a-hole, mudda-finga, SHIT!!!"

 Sure, I could've stopped and let the professionals step it but if I did, then the terrorists win.  God bless America!

DISCLAIMER:  No horses or dogs were injured in the making of this blog.  However two fingers, one lattice and my wife's sensitive ears didn't fair so well.

Day 180: An exercise in meditation...

I recently discovered this in a book a dear friend of mine sent me.  If you're considering meditation, read this first.  It'll help get you in the proper frame of mind so you can experience and enjoy all the benefits that meditation has to offer.

“Sitting quietly, feel what sits there.

Explore this body you sit in.

Observe the scintillating field of sensation we call the body.

Notice sensation’s wordless quality.

Its sense of simply being humming throughout the body.

Go within sensation to that subtle presence by which the sensation is known.  Feel the sensation within sensation.

Settle into that sense of being, of aliveness vibrating in each cell.

Rest in being.

Just sit quietly and know.  Let awareness sink into itself.

Know what knows.

Experience directly that sense by which you imagine you exist.

Enter it wholeheartedly.  Sit in the center of that hum.

Does it have a beginning?  Does it have an ending?

Or is there just a sense of endless being, unborn and undying?

Don’t ask the mind, which always limits itself with definitions, ask the heart, which cannot name it but always is it.

Rest in being.”

“Original Face Contemplation”

Stephen Levine

Day 179: A New Day...

A New Day

by Anonymous

If life seems at its lowest ebb,

Because a day's gone wrong.

Let not your heart be troubled,

For a new day soon will dawn

And we can never be quite sure,

Just what it has in store.

Since each one is so different,

Than the one just gone before

As it penetrates the darkness,

With its soft and tranquil beams.

It calms even the most restless soul,

And brings new hopes and dreams

So when a days been troubled,

And the night is dark and long.

Lift up your fallen spirits,

For a new day soon will dawn

Day 178: "And the Oscar goes to...... the Microwave!"

You know the one thing celebrities and appliances have in common?  Any one?  Any guesses?  Well, I'll tell you.  They all die in three's.  It's true!  So like with celebrities, when two appliances went down in a matter of days I was immediately keyed on seeing which would be the next to fall. 

It started a little over a week ago when our microwave decided to just do it's own thing, literally.  Without pressing a button or sending mental commands, it would just start up on it's own and wouldn't turn off unless unplugged.  A few days later, the blender decided to "walk into the light", right when I was in the middle of blending up a shake.  And yesterday, at the hottest point of the day, and the year for that matter, the AC put in for early retirement and caught a plane for Hawaii.  Amazing how quickly the thermostat jumps when there's no AC.  83, 85, 89.... I stopped looking when it hit 92.  I figured, why add to the depression?

Julie was a stronger person then I.  When it came time for bed I lasted all of 5 minutes at which point I sought refuge down in the basement.  Took the old futon mattress and some old sheets and "roughed" it.  Even Sophie came down stairs to get some relief.  She had this look of  "What the hell!  You gonna turn the AC back on any time soon?"  Well, hopefully that'll be some time today. Got someone coming out late this morning.  Hopefully it'll only take a little electrical defib to jump start this baby.  Otherwise, that ice bath is starting to look pretty good.

Day 177: "Fire!"

When I step out side and feel the heat and smell the smoke, I can't help but think of the Ohio Players and the song "Fire".  Wow, what's with the heat?  This was one of the reasons we left California.  All I need are a few shakers and some angry drivers and I'll feel like I'm right back in the OC. 

Poor dogs, even the heat is getting to them.  Sophie, who's usually a bit stir crazy after a day of pacing around the house, was out on the side deck reclining in one of our lounge chairs sipping lemonade (or at least I think it was lemonade - vodka bottle seems a little light).  I look at her and say, "What the f--k?"  She glances up at me and in her best southern belle accent says, "Honey, be a dear and freshen this up for me, would ya please?"  Roscoe, who's usually so wired tight he can actually create a black hole, is lying around like he's been blazin' up some righteous weed.  I swear I thought I heard him say, "Ya, man."  Belle, she just crawls under the bed with some of Julie's finest underwear and won't come out unless someone yells, "Who wants a treat?!"  She really is dumb.

The forecast is calling for a few straight days of 100 degrees or more.  It'll be in the mid to upper 90s through the weekend.  The extended forecast doesn't call for temps in the 80s until the 3rd of July with NO rain predicted at any time.  Hey, I can deal with the heat like most everyone else.  The thing that really gets me are all those fireman struggling to put out what seems to be a new fire every day.  I know what it's like to run around in shorts and a t-shirt in crazy hot weather but imagining what these men and women have to go through, what they have to wear, at altitude, for hours on end.... they really are heroes.  I just pray that some relief comes soon. 

Maybe if we all went outside and started washing our cars that might do the trick...

Day 176: Thrive...

Amazing how in harsh conditions life still manages to thrive.  I haven't tended to the front garden as much as I should but these little babies seem to be doing just fine on their own.  Amazing what nature (and humans) can do when placed in difficult situations.  My heart breaks for the folks who are suffering through the wildfires here in Colorado.  And our firefighters are putting on a Herculean effort to bring things under control.  I recall looking at the mountain sides, driving along I70, when we moved here three years ago.  Seeing all those dead and decaying forests, in the back of my mind I was thinking, "Wow, one spark and the whole thing will go up."  As much as you hate to think it you know it's nature's version of spring cleaning.  I just hate to see others suffer for it.  I guess it's a price we pay to live in such splendor.  But life, as always, will find a way.  All things are born again and a new splendor will be emerge in it's place before long. 

Day 175: "Dish best served cold..."

Justice has been served. Sandusky was found guilty on 45 counts of sexual crimes against a minor.  For weeks so many have been posting and chatting about this man's hideous crimes and his impending guilty verdict.  So many have been wanting their pound of flesh, voicing their anger and rage towards this animal and wishing to see a violent end to his existence.  Revenge!

Yeah, revenge is "a dish best served cold...", but really, how often is revenge satiated?  There's an immediate yet short-lived gratification when justice or karma has been served on the guilty.  But the feelings of pain, suffering and loss still exists and they will linger for years if not for one's entire life.  Revenge only destroys that which has caused us pain.  It cannot repair the damage that was originally done to us.

In this recent event I noticed that so many rejoiced over the verdict and made comments on how this animal's punishment should be doled out but nowhere have I seen or heard prayers or wishes of healing, compassion or love for all of those involved.  I'm sure many people feel that way but why is it we only have the courage to publicly denounce someone but will sit privately, quietly to think upon those that need the power of healing and love? Why can't we be just as open about our feelings of love as we are about our feelings of hate?

It's one thing to love the lovable but how about showing compassion or prayers for those that would cause you harm?  In Sandusky's case I'm not praying for his happiness or good will.  I pray that the evil within him that drove him to sexually terrorize children will somehow leave his soul.  My hating him would only bring more hate to a situation that screams for love and compassion.  He has created his own hell and will now live within it the remainder of his life.  Can't change that, nor do I want to.

But for the victims, their families and those close to them, I pray for their recovery.  I pray that feelings of fear, terror, anger, and hate will eventually be replaced with love, compassion, understanding and forgiveness.  It's a tough mountain to climb.  For some that may be an impossible task.  But truly, if we are only projecting feelings of rage then rage is what we will have.  Think upon those that have suffered and in your mind, heart and in your soul project feelings of calm, compassion, joy, trust, strength and most importantly, love.  Put it out there publicly and privately. 

Our salvation depends on it.

Day 174: Just another addiction...

Quitting.  It's a powerful drug.  Quitting is like meth.  Once you start you're hooked and the longer you do it the more it eats away your insides until you're nothing more than a shell of the person you use to be.  And like any addiction, stopping is a near impossibility until you finally admit you have a problem and YOU decide you want something better for yourself. 

So beware.  That immediate gratification you feel, when you give in to the burden that comes with any commitment, will soon dissipate and all you're left with is the nagging hangover of shame and self-loathing.  Do yourself a favor, don't start...

Day 173: I know I can, I know I can...

I heard something the other day that really resonated with me.  It wasn't that I hadn't heard it before but the way it was said got me thinking.  I'll paraphrase (mostly because my short term memory sucks), it was something along the lines of "if you want to achieve something you have to act like you already have."  I know that sounds kind of simple and I'm sure most of you are saying "Yeah, John, positive thinking.  Been there, heard that."  Yeah, it has something to do with positive thinking but I think it's a lot more.

Ever hear someone say, "Hey, you just have to learn to relax", and they never tell you how?  Sure, we all know we need to relax but most of us don't know how.  The ability to use positive thinking is no different.  We're told to have a positive mental outlook but we're clueless how so we just continue with our paranoia, anxiety and self-defeating methods of dealing with every day life.  Submersing ourselves in the "don't worry, be happy" mantra isn't the answer, although it is a catchy tune.

When the person says you need to "act" like you've already done something, this doesn't mean posturing or bragging. Think about anything you've accomplished in your life.  Not just the act that you performed but think about the feelings you had at that moment.  Think about HOW you felt before, during and after that event.  Through the entire event you probably went through the spectrum of emotions and feelings such as fear, anger, dread, determination, focus, assurance, joy.  The list goes on.  But I would bet that the end result of the entire event was a sense of accomplishment which I believe is the foundation of confidence.  And confidence is a sense of knowing within yourself that you have the capacity to do something even if you've never done it before and even if it scares the hell out of you.

So when the person says you need to "act" like you've done something, draw on the feelings and emotions you know will come when you attempt something new.  Bring yourself to that point where you remember and know what it feels like to have the self-assurance and confidence that comes from doing something.  Even if the thing you're about to attempt now is new to you, still draw on those previous experiences so your mind, body and spirit will remember, feel and believe that what you're attempting now is something you've already done before.  A perfect example is something I use to do back when I was doing triathlons.  Ocean swims ALWAYS freaked the hell out of me but the way I was able to overcome that fear was to mentally put myself back in the pool, to go over in my head all the feelings I had swimming in those lanes, how it felt on my body, how steady my breathing was and how confident I felt going up and down the swim lanes.  You can apply that same practice in anything you do in life.  Bring yourself to a point where you can think and feel confidence and retain that feeling while you're going through this new endeavor.

Remember, the best way to achieve success comes from the belief that what you're attempting now is something you've already accomplished.

Day 172: Back to the salt mines...

Well I guess it's that time to start packing things up and head for home.  It's been a great few days up in the mountains.  I'm really going to miss those early morning walks through the woods with Sophie.  Can't get over how great all three pooches were, even when we left them up in our room for a few hours while we hung out at the pool.  Speaking of pool, you'd think a person that's had melanoma twice would've thought to put on sunscreen.  Nice burn.  Dermatologist won't be all that thrilled.

It was a lot of fun exploring the different hiking trails around this area and I think relaxing by the creek, enjoying a simple picnic lunch was definitely the high point.  Can't wait to come back up here in September!

My spirits are up, my head is clear and I'm ready to take on what lies ahead back home and at work.  Now, if we could just get a little rain, PLEASE!

Day 171: Lazy dog days...

After a couple days of hiking and exploring I think we're all going to take an easy day today.  Out of the five of us only Sophie is ready to go hit the mountains.  Looking out the window I will say it's pretty tempting to want to go hike up the 13er.  I think when we come back in September I'll take Sophie up there.

The two little ones, Roscoe and Belle, would be very content lounging around the room eating and sleeping all day.  This is the most exercise Belle has gotten in a long time.  I know she's digging all the sights and smells but the trail hiking and going up and down several flights of stairs just to go to the bathroom is definitely not on her list of favorite things to do.  I guess you could say this is like her Fat Camp.  Roscoe, on the other hand, doesn't need exercise.  He's so high strung he burns calories worrying over whether or not Julie will come out of the bathroom.

Well, looks like it's time for another cup of coffee.  The dogs have pretty much taken over this bed.  You ought to see the "stink eye" they give me when I get up.  How could I be so insensitive, disturbing their sleep just because I want more coffee?  Boy, it's a real struggle trying to maintain the "Pack Leader" title in this family....

Day 170: Mental health days...

Technically a short vacation but this is really a time to decompress, get out into nature and let the worries of my life take a back seat for a while.  We're up in Breckenridge with the dogs for a few days.  It's absolutely gorgeous up here and a hell of a lot cooler than the oven-like conditions back home.  Dogs love it but given the altitude they tire pretty easy.  That actually works in our favor because they aren't getting up in the middle of the night for their evening constitution.  Taking it easy these next few days.  Hikes and lounging around the pool are our top activities, and God willing, capture a few nice images of this beautiful country side.

Hey folks, you don't need to be physically sick to take a day off of work or running a household.  Sometimes you just need to take a pause for the cause, give yourself some time to take time for YOU.  Re-energize for a day or two and come back to the fight with new enthusiasm and motivation.  You owe it to yourself and to those around you!

Day 169: My Dad...

I'd imagine that for most people growing up the first hero you ever had was probably your dad.  That was definitely the case for me.  I think from the start my dad was the hero from which all my other heroes were measured.  And I pretty much followed in his footsteps... majored in History, went through ROTC and got commissioned in the Army, served as a Military Intelligence officer.  Our likes are pretty similar.  We're die hard San Francisco 49ers and Giants fans.  We consider the Bay Area home even though I was technically not born there. He served in the Vietnam War, I served in the Cold War.  The list goes on...

I'd like to think our personalities are a bit similar as well.  We're generally peaceful, easy going folks but can get irritable over the dumbest things, like when we're tired or having to circumnavigate annoying shoppers when all we want to do is buy one thing.  When it comes to any home repair project, we both put our blood, sweat and swears into it.  And when I say blood, I mean that literally.  Yep, my dad taught me no great project ever came about without spilling a little blood. 

But above all he's always been a pretty straight forward guy.  Just tell it like it is.  Do what needs to get done.  Don't linger.  Don't waffle.  When it comes to making decisions, MAKE THEM and stick to them.  Get up and go!  And patience!  More than anything I would say patience is the most important lesson he's given me.  Yeah, I know some of you that know me and my dad will say, "Yeah, right, YOU'RE patient."  It's true, we do get pretty impatient at times, but I like to think we're patient when it matters.  When I was a boy he would help me with models and also taught me how to draw.  He'd always tell me when I'd get consumed with frustration, "put it down and walk away.  It'll be better when you come back in an hour."  And sure enough it always was.  I've been doing marathons and triathlons for years and I've spent thousands of hours and miles training for events.  It's a long, drawn out, "patient" process that doesn't produce immediate results but over time the meticulous efforts would payoff in the completion of events I scarcely believed were possible.  Patience is something I try to carry into my relationships and my work.  It's the one thing we all truly need. 

Dad, I can't begin to say how thankful I am to have you as my father.  All I can do is try to live up to your expectations and hopefully share with others the wonderful lessons you've provided me over the years.  I love you with all my heart and soul!

Happy Father's Day, Dad!!

Day 168: Mt. Evans Ascent, bagged and tagged!

I will say it was one of the quietest races I've ever competed.  I guess when you're racing in an environment where air is at a premium, you don't want to waste it on idle chit chat.

I started out following my game plan, running the first mile and then doing my "intervals", running three minutes, walking one.  Unfortunately that only lasted for about four miles.  I quickly found I needed to adjust my running to account for the lack of O2.  Guess it's God's way to make us stop and look around and take in the beautiful scenery.  That or He just doesn't want us hanging out up in his neighborhood.  There were quite a few competitors today, coming in all shapes and sizes.  Didn't get much of a look at the elite runners because they didn't hang around long after the gun went off.  I hung by the rest of the rabble, all of us wondering, "what the HELL are we doing here?"

This was definitely one of those punch you in the mouth, kick you in the crotch kind of race.  The last three miles were really an exercise in survival.  The interval running was long gone by then.  The best I could do was pick landmarks to run to and TRY to limit my recover walks but it pretty much turned into walks that were occasionally interrupted by slow meandering steps.  I got to the point that I could barely run more than 45 seconds before I got major dizzy spells.  My biggest fear at that point wasn't the likelihood of my heart exploding but the very real possibility that I would wander in front of an oncoming car, thus shattering my Olympic mountain running dream.  Even with my head in the clouds, literally and figuratively, I still retained some simple math skills and figured that given my slow pace I could still finish the race under the allotted time.  And finishing was ALL I wanted for today.

So another race is in the books.  It's definitely one to remember and as of right now probably one that won't be repeated.  But give me a couple weeks and I could very well change my mind.  I think my next 14er will include my camera, my dog and NO time limits.

Day 167: Coming storm...

Sorry, gang.  I have to admit I've been a bit distracted this week and it's just gotten worse as this race approaches tomorrow.  It's been a pretty busy, hectic week with work, travel and the thought of this impending challenge.  I've been all over the place mentally, one minute feeling I'll nail this race and other times feeling absolute terror that I've gotten myself into something too big for me.  Well it's too late to worry about all that now.  I just tell myself that 24 hours from now it'll all be over, for better or worse.  Not trying entertain negative energy but it's a safe bet I won't sleep well tonight.  Twice this week I woke up just after 3:00 AM and couldn't go back to sleep.  I just want this to be over.  I'm to the point that I'm just mad as frickin' hell.  The one thing that I truly hate in life, and I'm using the word "hate" here, is being afraid.  It's a sickening, defenseless feeling and I HATE it.  Guess the one thing I've had going for me all these years is that I can usually turn that fear into hate pretty quickly and it's the power of that hate that has fueled me through many obstacles in life.  I'm not saying it's a good thing and probably to some degree it's not healthy but it is what it is and I can't change the path I'm on now.  We'll see how tomorrow plays out.  I place my faith in God and the abilities He's given me. 

As Yoda once said, "Do, or do not.  There is no try." 

Day 166: Bullies...

The other day I came across an article in USA Today that really struck a chord with me. It was entitled “Bullies” and it went on to discuss the proliferation of bullying that is going on in our schools today and more disconcerting, the increasing number of suicides by the young victims who feel they have no recourse.  I have to admit my first thought after reading this article was “where was the victim’s parents in all this?” I tell you I can't begin to imagine the pain and suffering those families have had to endure when their child takes their own life. But my point is, how did this child get to the stage in their life that they felt suicide was the only option available to them? And let me be frank here, suicide is quitting, plain and simple. It's not a judgment.  It's just a fact I subscribe.  So, when did this child learn to be a quitter?  Well, I'll tell you...

We've coached, encouraged and rewarded children to be victims.  Parents today seemed more concerned about enrolling little Johnny into the School for the Gifted Gay Basket Weavers rather than the School of Hard Knocks.  With parents coddling their young, eliminating the fundamentals of competition in sports and school, endorsing the “no child left behind” philosophy, all of this with the intent of raising a young adult that will attain some level of self-esteem, has actually done quite the opposite by turning these youngsters into weak minded, weak spirited individuals with a “Kick Me” sign attached to their backs.

Certainly the bullies are getting more severe in their terror campaigns. Hell, even parents are getting into the act. Remember the mom who created a bogus Facebook account just to harass a girl in the neighborhood?  Those people need to be brought to justice and it needs to be swift and harsh. I’m not sure sensitivity training is the answer. You can’t legislate how someone thinks or feels but you certainly can make their life miserable. If only our legal system had the courage to put the screws to these monsters.

But the last and best defense against a bully is what’s inside that victim. As I’ve alluded to above, we’ve spent the better part of the last 20 plus years teaching our children to be victims. It’s time we went “Old School” and started teaching our kids how to stand up for themselves, to have REAL confidence and not look for someone to protect them. Folks, you HAVE to take those training wheels off your kids. I’m not saying you need to endanger their lives but you certainly need to put them in situations where they will have to struggle and possibly fail. The true measure of someone’s character is developed and displayed in the way they deal with adversity. This isn't something you try to discover as you walk into your freshman class in high school. This goes all the way back to learning to get back on the bike after falling, overcoming the fear of the jungle gym or that creepy attic, not making the team, failing a test, or being teased.

Children need to learn that it's ok to be scared and that failure IS a possibility but it's incumbent upon them to draw on that inner strength that EVERY human being has.  The only difference between those that suffer and endure and those that suffer and quit is the early experience gained from hardship and struggle.  To take a line from another of my favorite movies, "A League of Their Own", when Tom Hanks describes the virtue of baseball, "...it's the hard that makes it great."  If life didn't include struggle, how could you truly enjoy it's magnificence?

Day 165: Rain...

Love Reign O'er Me

"...Only love

Can bring the rain

That makes you yearn to the sky.

Only love

Can bring the rain

That falls like tears from on high..."

The Who, Peter Townshend

Day 164: Not what it seems...

I think airports are a portal to another dimension and not for the obvious reasons you might think (air travel). The physical effects caused by this phenomenon can't be ignored. It usually manifests itself in the loss of equilibrium and the neck becomes a motorized swivel. No one is capable of walking a straight line and heads swivel from side to side in a rhythmic cadence, eyes searching for the ever elusive McDonalds, Starbucks or restroom. People will stop in their tracks to gaze up at the flight information boards as if waiting for a sign from God. Well here's a sign, move your 17 frickin' pieces of "carry-on" luggage from blocking the walk way so the rest of us can get to our planes!
There is other evidence that will support my claim. The ability to differentiate between "Priority Access" and "Group 4" is lost. So is the capacity to count numbers and letters sequentially. How does one confuse seat 17D with 23B? Even one's sense of size and space are drastically diminished. "Yes, sir, that was your backpack that crashed into my head as you twisted about trying to figure out where your seat is."
Well, my flight says "Boston". Lord knows where I'll land. "See you on the other side, Ray."

Day 163: Angst...

The week leading up to any significant event tends to be a bad week for me.  Physically there's nothing more I can do to prepare for this race (Mt. Evans Ascent) but I can certainly hurt it.  I have to reign back my workouts, toning down the intensity and allowing myself the opportunity to rest and feed myself in preparation for the race coming up this Saturday.  From this point on my struggles are almost purely mental.  Sleepless nights have already started.  The recurring dreams have started as well.  You know, the ones where I'm late getting to the race for one reason or another.  I typically wake with a start, feeling for just a moment that I'm actually late for the race.  My mood tends to go south as well with even the littlest thing aggravating me.  I'll admit I'm really not a pleasant person to be around. 

The waiting is what kills me.  So much time to think and worry over what may or may not happen.  I play out every conceivable scenario in my head and try to imagine how I'll respond to each.  I know my path is set and there's no turning back.  Like a pregnant woman who's within days of her due date, I just want this damn thing to be over.  I know I'll be fine once the gun goes off and I settle into my game plan.  Until then, I have days to wait.  Days to let this churn in my stomach.  Days to think and pray and to hopefully find some inner peace that will carry my through. 

As a favor to you all and to myself, I won't talk much more about this until after the race.  I'll leave you with this, my self-imposed challenge...

"Come back with your shield, or on it." - Spartan saying (Plutarch)

Day 162: Quiet time...

Not a lot to talk about today.  This morning I took Sophie out on an early hike up above Boulder around Flagstaff Summit and Artist Point.  I brought my camera and did snap a few pictures but this morning was really just quiet time for me and my hiking buddy.  I found myself just taking in the sights and sounds of nature.  No one was around.  No car sounds.  No chatter from other hikers.  Just a few deer and squirrels scurrying about.  There's something about the smell of the pines, the sound of gravel crunching under your boots and the rhythmic panting of your dog that just brings about a level of peace and serenity that is seldom experienced in our daily lives.  I really consider myself blessed that I can find such peace and quiet so close to home.  The early morning hours are such a perfect time to be alone with your thoughts and prayers.  Your senses are so keen, able to take in so much around you that you'd otherwise overlook through the latter parts of the day.  I truly hope that I'll be able to do this when I'm long in the tooth and short of breath.  Just wish my Sophie could live forever.  Or at least out live me. 

Day 161: Bitch, thy name is Karma

Ever do something out of anger and the moment you did it you realize "Oh, crap!  I wish I hadn't done that!"?  Well, forgive me, Father, for I have sinned, again. 

This morning we got up early to get going on some yard work before the sweltering heat set it.  (What the hell, are we in Texas?).  Any way, after running up to Ace to get some supplies, planting a tree and a bush, it was time to mow the lawn.  Keep in mind, Mr. Cranky Pants was in all his full glory by now.  I did my best to keep my wits in check as the swarm of gnats enveloped me.  Apparently my Jihad on those buggers a couple of weeks ago didn't take.  They must hide out in a labyrinth of tunnels under my yard, just waiting for me to venture out onto the grass.  So I'm mowing the lawn, blowing and spitting gnats away from my face when all of a sudden what do I find?  A frickin' "tootsie roll", aka dog turd.  Now keep in mind I did a full scale, military style sweep of the yard before I started mowing but somehow one of my little rat dogs managed to plant this lovely, little landmine in the path of my mower. 

Well, that was the straw that broke the camels back.  Without letting go of the throttle, I uttered one of my favorite colorful metaphors, bent down and (with gloves on), flick this doggie dung off to the side of the yard.  Unfortunately I was a bit more angry about this then I had realized because I didn't just flick it off the grass.  With my superhuman strength I managed to launch this turd up and over the fence into my neighbors yard.  SHIT!  Honestly it wouldn't have been all that bad considering nearly all my neighbors have dogs and it would've fit right in with the rest of the poo.  But this particular neighbor has no dogs and as a matter of fact, their entire back yard is one big slab of concrete.  It's kinda hard to hide a turd on concrete. 

Needless to say I wrapped up my mowing with the speed of an Olympic sprinter and bolted for the front yard to finish up my man chores.  No sooner did I start the mower that I notice a nice pile of poo in my front yard.  What the hell!?  But before I could even entertain the idea of being wronged by the cosmos it occurred to me that Karma counter-punched me with swift vengeance.  She wasted no time in correcting this imbalance brought on by my carelessness in the back yard.  Hey, I had it coming.  Call it "Tit for Turd" I guess.  With unusual calm and serenity I got my little bucket and hand shovel and removed the doggy deposit and continued on with my chores. 

Wow, amazing how quickly somethings can come back to bite you.  Here's hoping me and Karma are square now. 

Note:  Yeah, not one of my better pictures but it's appropriate for the situation.