Day 366: It...is...finished!

This day has finally come.  This blog which has consumed me for the past year has now come to an end.  It has been 366 days, thanks to it being a leap year, and it's been quite a journey.  In many respects this blog has been like running a marathon.  At times I cursed it and often I struggled to be creative and interesting all the while thinking why the hell did I allow myself to be talked into this.  But as I come to the finish line of this endeavor I have to be honest in that I come to it with a great sense of gratification, relief and also a fair amount of sorrow.  I learned a hard lesson many years ago when I trained for and completed my first marathon.  Within days of completing that event I went through a pretty severe bout of depression mostly because everything that made up my life up to that point had come to an end.  Similarly just as much as I wanted to finish this blog it saddens me to know a big part of my life is now done. 

The intentions of this blog were originally to post new photographs each day but as time wore on these posts began to include more and more commentary.  Events of the days slowly began to creep into my posts to where it wasn't just photos but also musing and rants.  There were plenty of times I struggled to create.  I can't tell you how many days I would sit there thinking "Oh my God, I have NO frickin' idea what to blog about today" but every time something always came up.  For those of you that have followed this blog you'll agree that not every entry was an awe-inspiring moment.  In many respects this blog has been like the Seinfeld show, a show about nothing.  I know at times I probably shared more than I should have and there were times I tempered some things because I was concerned about audience reaction but I do feel that I've been truthful and honest.  If nothing else I just hoped that folks might walk away from reading this blog and think here's a guy who's lived through much of the same crap I did.  I know in our disappointments and despair we can feel alone and I just hope that my sharing of my dirty laundry was a way of letting you know you're not alone and there is some comfort in shared misery.

I will admit my ego got the better part of me at times.  Trying to be overly creative in my photos or excessively profound in my rants only to realize I could be quite a tool at times.  I've received many gracious compliments on my posts but I have to say I got so much more from you, the readers, than I feel I ever gave you.  So many of you have been wonderful inspirations to me.  So many great photographers, artists, and just plain wonderful human beings.  During some of my difficult times this year I was renewed and strengthened by your positive outlook on life and no matter how dark my days had been you always managed to brighten my life with compassion and hope.

This blog, this experience, has been a tremendous blessing for me.  Through many of you I learned a lot about myself and the world I live in.  In many respects I think I've finished this year a better person than when I started and that's all because of you guys.  I'm honored that you've read my blog and I'm humbled by the compliments you've given me throughout the year.  It's kinda weird to think this has only been one year of my life but I think capturing these daily events has helped me to realize that we all have exceptional lives, that blessings come to us in so many subtle forms and if we really took time to examine who we are we would be pleased with what we found.

Jen, thank you for kick starting this for me although I'll admit there were times I grumbled your name.  Jane, you've been my biggest fan and have encouraged me all along the way and I love you dearly for being a big part of my family.   And my Julie, not only are you the love of my life but you truly are my inspiration.  Your passion for life and your unconditional love for so many is something I aspire to emulate.

No matter how hard I tried, no words nor photos have ever been able to capture the depth and perfection of any given moment in time.  It's only through participation in these experiences that the moment will become a lasting memory.  And if this year and this blog has proven anything to me it's that there really are no ordinary moments, no ordinary days.  This has been a year of milestones and firsts.  I turned the big 5.0., I got my first tattoo, I ran the Mt. Evans Ascent and I climbed Longs Peak.  I rekindled old friendships and made new ones.  I feel I've grown in my art through the inspiration of other more gifted photographers and I've discovered a new depth to the significance of relationships with my family and friends. 

I hope you've enjoyed this blog as much as I've enjoyed sharing it with you.  I hope that I've been able to make you laugh, to think and most importantly, feel.  If I've done that in any way then I'll consider this journey a success. Perhaps some of you may have gleaned a little inspiration from these posts or maybe this has all been nothing more than the ravings of a middle aged suburban madman.  Regardless of the outcome it truly has been a journey and I thank you all for sharing it with me.

Happiest of New Years to you.  May God's blessings be showered upon you and yours and may good fortune be yours this day and all days.  Cheers to 2012 and here's hoping I see you on the other side.

This is John signing off.....

Day 365: Happy Anniversary...

Yes, it's an anniversary of sorts.  Nine years ago today my wife Julie "winked" at me.  "Huh??"

For those of you who don't know, my wife and I met on the internet.  Yeah, took me a few years to openly admit that.  Even though I'm finding it a bit more common I think the practice of finding your soul mate online bordered a bit on the pathetic and desperate and brought on images of the creepy, lonely guy sitting in his dark, ratty apartment preying on unsuspecting kids.  You've heard the stories, mail order Russian brides or "To Catch a Predator".  I guess now there are dozens of online matchmaking sites but the two big ones back then were eHarmony and Match.com.  I tried eHarmony but it was too much of a "trust me, we'll find the right one for you" and more often than not you'd be matched up with someone SOOOOO not compatible with you thus leading to the awkward attempts to disengage yourself without coming off as insensitive or hurtful.  But Match.com was a nice little system.  I managed to meet several nice people and my overall experience was rather positive.

So back in time to December 30th, 2003.  There I was living alone in my apartment (not dark or creepy), the year winding down and very few prospects for the coming year.  The day before, on the 29th, I perused the various online profiles.  It was kinda like trying to select someone for your fantasy football league.  There were some of the old standbys, those that hadn't found anyone yet so their profiles were constantly popping up.  I remember doing some quick searches and coming across Julie's profile.  Of course being a guy the first thing I noticed was how gorgeous this woman is.  Did a quick once over of her playing stats and thought wow, she's an amazing woman.  But having the confidence and self-esteem of a Leonard Hofstadter (see Big Bang Theory) I quickly dismissed her with a "she'd never be interested in me."  So it was nine years ago today that I got a message that said, "The following people are interested in you" or as they would say they "winked" at you.  Just so you know winking is today's "Poke" in Facebook.  Anyways, would you believe it?  My Julie was one of those winkers.  To say I was dumbfounded would be a major understatement.  Lacking any real common sense I just winked back, thinking that anything beyond that might come off as excessive or just plain needy.  I did come to find out later that right off the bat I kinda pissed her off.  See, Julie had just canceled her subscription to Match.com, having had very little success.  Just goes to prove that most men are colossal tools, especially those from the OC.  In order for her to respond to my "wink" she had to go back in and sign up for an additional month just so she could send me a message essentially saying, "Hey, A-hole, here's my number, CALL!"

So we dated, virtually, for over two weeks before finally meeting in person.  For one reason or another it didn't seem to work out for us to meet but we did talk every night from any where to an hour and a half to three hours about any and all things.  I think that sold me more than anything else, that we connected so well on so many things without the distraction of being together physically.  I'll leave that to your imagination, no details here.  And call me a sentimental old fool but I still have copies of a few of our first emails to each other.  Again, I think of all the gifts I've received in my life, the birth of my Sam and finding my Julie are the two most wonderful gifts of all.  But I still think Julie lost a bet.

I don't expect a lot of folks to relate to this story.  I figure most of you met your significant other either through high school, college, a class reunion or perhaps rehab.  But hopefully this might make you think back on the time when you and your mate first met and the magic you felt and hopefully you still carry that magic in your heart now.  You know any day you can spend with your love is a great day.

Happy anniversary, honey!  I love you THHHHHHHIIIIISSSSSSS much!

Day 364: To be a "Mad Men"

So it was another early morning as my wife headed out to work at 0'dark 30.  As is my custom I flipped on the TV to catch the local news only to find that the normal morning news show was pre-empted by "Does Your Bra Fit?"  Forget it, guys, it wasn't what you might think.  A collection of whiny and overly excited women talking about the inadequacies of their over-the-shoulder-bolder-holders.  Yeah, I can still channel my inner 7th grader.

It got me thinking, though.  They sure don't have infomercials similar to that for men.  But hey why not?  They could make one called "Why Can't I Pee?" It'll be about enlarged prostates and how discomforting it can be not being able to drain the old bladder.  Now because us men have zero patience and the attention span of a gnat, it'll have to be some uber-strength medicinal treatment that will allow a guy to pee almost immediately.  And of course it'll have to be presented in some competitive format, maybe something like this...

"Tom and Phil both have prostates the size of soft balls and peeing for them is a near impossibility without the help of Mr. Catheter.  Now for the past four hours we've been plying both men with pints of beer so they should be ready to burst at any moment.  We've given Tom the Mega-Hose prostate reducing pill while Phil has only had beer and an excessive amount of buffalo wings.  Now look at that!  Tom is peeing like no one's business.  He's actually cracked the porcelain urinal and he's not finished!  We just set a chemical fire
on the other side of studio and he's put it out with just a quick blast of his man hose.  

Now let's check in on Phil.  Poor guy, he's still standing there in what can only be described as severe pain with nary a drop of urine to show for his efforts.  Profusely sweating, his eyes rolled back in his head and mumbling in some unintelligible language, his teeth are LITERALLY floating.  WOOOOO, look out, he's gonna blow!!!  BOOOOOSHHHHHH!  Wow, good thing we gave ponchos and slickers to our studio audience."

Maybe I could get Gallagher as one of the co-hosts along with Sean Connery.  I'm sure they could use the work.  And because it'll be a guy commercial, I'll need a bunch of Hooters girls as well.  Hey, gotta appeal to the target audience.

So what do you think?  Great idea, huh?  Pour me a drink and call me Mr. Draper.

Day 363: Buddy, have ya got the time?

Time, it's a self-inflicted wound.

It is an arbitrary measure that provides some structure and order to our lives.  Starts and finishes can all be measured by time.  It's a great measuring stick for performance and it helps us to understand our place in human history.  But in many respects time has become the bane of our very existence.  It limits and restricts us.  Now I'm not saying we need to do away with all elements of time.  Hey, if it wasn't for time planes would never leave or arrive.... oh wait, bad example.  Time does matter but it is something we've created and over the millenniums we've allowed it to control us rather than serve us. 

It is kinda cool to watch the Times Square New Years Eve celebration in New York but it is still just some random moment lost in the cosmos.  Even though it's fun to count down as the ball drops or counting down the last few seconds of a game our team is winning, time does create a significant amount anxiety and stress.  Ever run to catch a plane, the Metro or race through town in your car just to make an appointment?  How about trying to meet work deadlines or complete tasks sooner?  We're all slaves to this task master called time.  We talk about lost time, made time, no time, or plenty of time.  Kind of ironic that time is the one thing that keeps us out of the present time.  Regardless of what we're doing now, time will always warn us of what lies ahead which keeps us from completely enjoying the present moment.  "Wow, I'm having so much fun but I need to be somewhere in about an hour."

Somehow we think we can control time by buying into this misnomer of "making time".  There's nothing to make.  Time isn't something that comes in a pouch where you add water and microwave it for two minutes and, BOOM, you've got yourself an extra hour.  Making time really means making priorities.  When we say we don't have time for relationships, goals or ambitions, the inconvenient truth is that we don't want to make those things priorities in our lives.  Diets, marriages, relationships, education, jobs, we fail in all of these things because we don't make priorities out of them.  On the contrary we typically blame it on not having enough time, that we're too busy just trying to satisfy the basics of Maslow's hierarchy of needs.  Hey, whatever.  Excuses are a dime a dozen, even in this economy.

If it really is something important to you than pay attention to it.  Tend to it and nurture it as if it's very existence depends on you, which in fact it actually does.  Take your watch off, turn your clocks around and just be in the moment.  There's no better time than the present.  Some of our best moments occur when we lose track of time.  Playing with our children or grandchildren, a dinner out with friends, snuggling on the couch with our spouses.  There's so much wonder and joy in the present moment.  If there is anything that's important to you then make it important to you right NOW.  

Day 362: An unspectacularly good day...

 It was a "mish mosh" kinda day.  Nothing out of the ordinary and certainly nothing all that profound.  But hey, not every day needs to be an epiphany day.  Some times days are just filled with a whole bunch of nothing-in-particulars but it still leaves you with a good feeling in your heart. Got up on my own this morning, had time to share a cup of joe with my bride and then grabbed all my snow boarding gear and made my way up to Arapahoe Basin.  A VERY uneventful day on the roads, just the way I like it.  No slippin' and slidin' this time.  Just low and slow along the wintery roads in my new snow tires, thank you very much.  Got a chance to show off my mad snow boarding skills to no one in particular.  Met a guy on the lifts who's a part time fireman and part time ski patrol/medic.  And yes, ladies, he's single.  Told him I've got about a dozen resumes of single women who'd be all over that.  I only require a finder's fee.  I will say it was colder than an evil woman's mammaries so it kinda cut into my boarding time but that's ok because it gave me a chance to have a late (2:00 PM) breakfast at my new favorite eating establishment, The Early Bird Restaurant.  Great food and the servers are pretty cute, well except for that one guy.  It is the one place I can shamefully and unabashedly hit on a particular waitress, who just so happens to share my bed.  Yeah, that's right, Johnny's got his mojo workin'!

So this day is just about done and I'll definitely file it under "Good Days".  Probably a good time to wrap this one up any way.  I've got a UFC match going on right now in my office between the Golden Lab and the Shih Tzu and Sophie's getting schooled.  TAP OUT, SOPHIE, TAP OUT!!  

Day 361: "We find the defendant guilty!"

"I can't believe I ate the whole thing."  "You ate it, Ralph."  Remember that commercial?  Overindulgence that led to indigestion.  This time of year our overindulgence's typically lead to guilt.  And as the year winds down and we reflect on the shortcomings of our intentions many of us will suffer those same feelings of guilt over the things we should've done or shouldn't have done.  

It's safe to say many of us ate too much, drank too much, and spent too much during this past month.  And that was just during the holidays.  I'm sure there were plenty of less than stellar things we've done throughout the year that we would've thought better of after the fact but guilting ourselves over yesterday's spilt milk is about as useful an activity as counting the calories of those six cinnamon rolls AFTER we ate them.  There is absolutely NOTHING useful about guilt.  Now don't get me wrong.  I'm not saying you shouldn't feel any remorse for something you've done wrong.  You do need to make amends with those you've wronged even if that person is you.  There are those that like to swim in the deep end of the guilt pool and they're what I like to call the pity party planners.  "Oh I'm sorry.  I'm such a horrible person."  Blah blah blah.  They're the ones that rant over and over about how bad they feel over something but do little to correct the situation, or more importantly, themselves.

Now for the obsessive compulsives guilt can be a bit of a motivator.  Just ask any serious runner.  One time I actually made myself run one mile for every bread stick I had at the Olive Garden.  That was a long 18 mile run.  But the difference here is accountability.  We tend to confuse the two.  Guilt is a great inhibitor.  It drains you of your self-esteem, it convinces you that you're a worthless person and pretty much keeps you locked in your tracks.  Accountability, on the other hand, is an acknowledgement that we need to atone for the shortcomings in our behaviors.  It's a starting point for action.  Energies are focused on righting the wrong rather than bemoaning the error.  I can't say whether it's a healthy practice or not but I like to keep my little guilt nuggets just as a reminder that I always have opportunities to better myself and to use them to establish boundaries to my behaviors.

So as we look back over yesterday's festivities don't waste a lot of time feeling guilty over it.  Just acknowledge that they happened and that from here on out you have a plan to right your ship.  We may have plowed through several helpings of that prime rib, mashed potatoes, a couple bottles of wine and Lord knows how many slices of pie but instead of wallowing in guilt make a choice to do something better for yourself.   Perhaps you can restart your exercise program or go for more walks.  Hey, when you're out and about running errands consider parking at the far end of the parking lot.  The key here is just make an effort, no matter how small.  Remember guilt is what tells us we suck and the truth is you ARE a very special, unique and amazing person.  God would create nothing less.

Day 360: Gifts...

I'll admit even as a child it always struck me as odd that we would celebrate a holiday by giving gifts to one another.  Don't get me wrong, I wanted all those wonderful toys I got as a child and usually had a pretty lengthy wish list but it just seemed weird that we would just go out and buy each other random things as a symbol of our faith.  I know Christmas is more than just gift buying but in my simple mind, which hasn't changed much over the years, it just seems like it kinda got twisted into a celebration of wants.

I tell ya right now I totally suck at gift buying and this whole season creates more pressure and anxiety for me, trying to figure out what to get someone.  There was a post not long ago on Facebook that said something along the lines of "as I get older the gifts that matter most to me don't cost anything."  I'm sure I butchered the saying but hopefully you caught the meaning. I realize now, more than ever, that no purchased gift would ever come close to the things that matter most to me which is life itself.  Like a Master Card commercial, "A Canon 5D Mark III, $3,500.  The gift of life, priceless."  I don't just mean the gift of being alive.  I mean the gift of my very own existence and everything that defines my life, no matter how big or small.  My family and friends.  My vocation and hobbies.  My dreams, ambitions, tastes, interests and experiences.  The list goes on and on.  I couldn't put a price tag on all the things that have forged the path of my life.  Every person I've encountered and every experience along the way has created the man I am today.

So the question for me has been, if all these people and all these experiences have created this gift of life that I'm experiencing, am I such a gift in anyone else's life?   And if not, why not?  It's nice to buy that special gift for someone, spend the money on some really cool toy or gadget.  But have I been more than that?  The real gift is not the tangible object we give but actually BEING the gift.  How you live and love and how you engage the world around you is the real, true gift.  I am truly blessed with so many wonderful people in my life and so many wonderful and extraordinary experiences.  I know some of you may read this and feel that it doesn't apply to you, that you have nothing to offer anyone.  It may just be a story but the point is true...The little drummer boy had nothing to offer but a song in his heart and that was truly priceless compared to all the riches bestowed upon the baby Jesus by the three wise men.  Gold gets spent, frankincense gets consumed, toys break, clothes wear out, technology gets antiquated, but the impact we have on each other is truly priceless.  I couldn't begin to put a value on what my friends, family and even casual acquaintances are to me.  Like George Bailey, he may have been broke but what he meant to those around him goes beyond words.  There are a lot of George Bailey's in my life.  I can only hope that I could be half as much to others.

So as we exchange gifts this Christmas day, tearing into that new camera equipment or gaming console or that jacket we've always wanted, remember that the real gift is YOU and the greatest gift we can give one another is each other.

Merry Christmas and God's blessings upon you and yours this day and always...

Day 359: This moment...

Over the last several years I've been practicing to be "in the moment", to appreciate where I am now and not dwell on the past nor fret over things that may or may not come to pass.  There are a number of great authors that "preach" this not so new but overlooked perspective.  The books by Eckhart Tolle, such as "The Power of Now", are very insightful and really help to focus all your energies towards the moment at hand.  But I will say at this time of the year and especially on Christmas Eve it's pretty hard staying in the moment.  As a kid all I could think about was Christmas morning and all those gifts under the tree.  I was so consumed with anticipation that getting any kind of sleep Christmas Eve was a near impossibility.  Yes, one year I actually did try to wake my parents at 4:00 in the morning to open gifts.  That really didn't go over too well.  But as I've gotten older I find myself anticipating less and reminiscing more.  I reflect on Christmas' past and all the wonderful memories they conjure up.  I won't bore you with those details but suffice it to say I think we all have our own collection of Christmas memories and I'm sure we're all reflecting on them now.  The silly little traditions, the unique stories of family and friends, they all fill us with a sense of longing and a wonderful reminder of what Christmas is all about.

But not all of my thoughts are in the past.  I am looking forward to the day I can spend Christmas with my folks, my sisters and their families.  I look forward to the day when my daughters marry, have kids and once again I'll be able to see the excitement of Christmas through the eyes of grandchildren.  But for now I'm in this moment, writing this blog, drinking my hazelnut coffee, with a house full of obnoxious dogs all playing on my last nerve.  But I can't imagine any other place I'd rather be.  Well, I wouldn't mind having the rest of my family with me.  So "being in the now" I'll continue to reflect on Christmas memories and look forward to creating many more.  I might have to blot out the one where we thought it would be an awesome idea to watch someone else's dog during Christmas, bringing the total number of canines in the house to five plus one cat.  Where's the spiked eggnog?

Day 358: Almost there...

Wow, I cannot believe I'm in the single digits now.  Less than 10 days left on my 365 blog.  I remember when this whole crazy thing started and how I had to constantly NOT remind myself I had over 360 days to go.  It's been quite a ride.  Like a marathon, though, it seems the closer I get to the finish line the harder it is.  "What?  I still have two miles to go?!  Shit!!"  Alright, let's finish this thing strong. 

Like everything in life, including life, all things must come to an end.  But don't forget that all these endings are just a prelude to new beginnings.  I know it's tough to deal with at times.  With the year winding down depression grips a lot of folks much more than at any other time of the year.  Thanks to our calendar it conveniently segments our lives into beginnings and endings and it forces us to look at a small period of time in our lives with some arbitrary measuring stick to determine our self worth.  But for some of you that may be feeling down right about now, let me ask you this.  When looking back on a year, oh say 10 to 15 years ago, does it bring back any of that same melancholy that you're feeling right now?  I would bet it doesn't.  You'll have memories of different things that occurred in your life, some good and some not so good, but I'd bet you wouldn't have a lot of memories of feeling depressed, at least not the way many of us do at this time of the year.

So let me ask this of you or at least let this be my prayer for you, when those feelings of depression and failure start to creep into your mind just say "Edit!"  Take those thoughts and edit them out of your mind and your heart.  I know it'll be harder for some but do try to hold onto the blessings that you've experienced every day of your life.  No matter how your holiday preparations are going, no matter how this year has turned out for you, finish strong.  Finish with the knowing that this has been another wonderful year for you and look upon the year to come with great anticipation because amazing things are coming your way and the rest of us can't wait to share in your joys and triumphs. 

Day 357: Family fun...

I think they need to create a video game about grocery shopping.  With the ever growing obsession over these ultra-reality combat games like Men of War why not have a game about something more close to home?  I mean think about it, those clowns that are all into these combat video games, how close are they EVER going to get to the taste of real battle?  Now grocery shopping, that's a real life danger that lurks on nearly every street corner of every town.  To survive the battle grounds of your local grocery store takes great cunning, steal nerves and cat-like reflexes to overcome the killer obstacles that await you on every aisle. 

So here's how the game unfolds....

The commander (wife) issues the orders (grocery list), and I'm sent off on a suicide mission (shopping during mid day on a weekend at a local King Soopers) to capture a cache of supplies (food) that would sustain the unit (family) for the next week (Christmas dinner).  A quick recon of my AO (checking the aisle directory) and I'm off on my mission.  Now keep in mind the enemy comes in many forms, each more deadly than the next.  There's the "lost man" (husband) who is mostly oblivious to his surroundings and looks more like he'd prefer to impale himself with an asparagus spear than carry on with his mission.  He's usually easy to overcome, just try to avoid him.  Next is the shelf stocker.  They, too, tend to get in your way although they can provide an updated map of your AO (give you directions) to your objective.  There are the "tailers", the ones that seem to follow you down every aisle always looking for the same thing you are and will always get the last item before you do.  The real frightening ones are the "Mad Mama's", the ones that barrel down each aisle in their mechanized chairs, plowing through all the displays, smashing through shopping carts and will pin you against the baking goods if you're not quick and agile.  The real trick to the game is trying to locate all the food stuffs without seeking the help of the "Oracle", the mystical store clerk that knows where everything is and all the names they go by.  So for example, when searching for the "crispy onions", you can try to find them on your own but that's a near impossibility.  Remember you only have so much time to complete your mission before your commander radios (texts) you to determine your location, i.e. "where the hell are you?!"  See, you might think these "crispy" onions would be in the produce section but only the Oracle knows that they in fact are located in the canned vegetable section, on the bottom shelf in a cylinder shaped cardboard container.  No mortal would ever know such a thing. 

Great gift idea, huh?  I mean there's so much potential here.  You can have different levels like Clothes Shopping With Your Wife, Parent/Teacher Meetings, or my favorite, Getting a Physical scenario.  Who needs shoot 'em up games when you could be playing the games of life?  Hey, I think I'm on to something here....

Day 356: We all want playing time...

When I was a sophomore playing on the varsity football team in Heidelberg all I wanted was a little playing time to prove I was good, that I could compete with the big guys and that I could contribute to the outcome on the playing field.  You know in life we worry about being superstars.  I don't mean living the life where we hob knob with celebrities and get chased by paparazzi.  We want to be superstars in our own lives.  We want to do well at work, in our relationships and our hobbies. It's all about expressing that creative entity that resides within us.  Call it our spirit or whatever but it begs to come out.  Even the most recluse person wants to demonstrate who they are even if it's only to himself. 

There's a fine line between just wanting to express and create who we are and succumbing to vanity that seeks the praise and approval of others.  Vanity isn't necessarily a bad thing.  In it's purest form it's a sense we have deep down inside our very souls that we matter, that we have a gift, that there's something special  and unique about who we are and personally I know that to be God's constant reminder that He loves us.  I think that if someone truly felt, from their very essence, that there was no worth to their existence they would just disappear into the faceless crowd never to be seen or heard from again.  Folks like that, I think, tend to be the one's that go off quietly and end themselves with no fanfare or breaking news headline.  I can't help but feel that in some way these mass killers we've seen this past year know within themselves there's was something special about them but through a life time of unfortunate events never received the acknowledgement of who they are and therefore took their vanity to such hideous lengths that they destroyed the lives of so many. 

I know this is just dime store psychology but it's just a perception I have.  I'm not looking to protect the criminal.  On the contrary, the chick shit killer got off easy taking himself out.  I had more "stimulating" ways of dealing with such monsters.  I don't think inviting big government into our homes to solve our psycho kid problems is the answer too, unless we want to consider mandating that you have to have a license to have children (said tongue in cheek).  Perhaps I'm taking a simplified view but aside from the exceptionally rare cases of genetic predisposition towards violence, I feel that the "village" that's raised these monsters failed.  These killers, often described as "disengaged" became that way because no one engaged with them, most especially their parents.  We've become a society where the computer, iPhone and XBox are now the babysitters.  "As long as Johnny is quiet in his room not disturbing me then all is good in the world.  Hey, I've had a rough day, I don't have time to go chit chat with my kid about some homework assignment."

Is it painful at times to listen to your child drone on about some childish topic?  You bet, but it's THEIR topic and right now it's the most important thing in the world to them.  If you don't acknowledge that then you're putting your child on a path that could potentially lead to a life of depression, anxiety, insecurity, frustration, resentment or worse.  That doesn't mean you need to kowtow to them either.  Children need to learn that not only what they think matters but that they need to be able to express themselves in a manner that's mature and respectful and that requires discipline, restraint and patience.  Unfortunately those things never get taught during "time outs". 

There's much talk in the media these days about gun control and other legislative controls but I won't even go into that.  Those things are only working to solve symptoms, not problems.  Don't worry, I'm not telling you we need to go out and save the world.  Just save the little bit of the world that's around you.  Showing a little attention, showing a genuine interest in those people, young or old, that fill your lives is a huge first step in saving this world.  Come on, we got a reprieve from the Mayans.  Let's go out there and express who we are and encourage others to do the same.  In life, EVERYONE gets playing time.  

Day 355: A moment of clarity...

I think one of my most favorite Christmas memories was coming home from a Christmas Eve service back when we lived in Heidelberg.  We weren't quite ready to go to bed and no amount of haggling with my parents was going to get me any closer to opening presents so we decided to turn on AFN (Armed Forces Network) and see what was on.  Some old black and white movie called "It's a Wonderful Life" was about to come on and to say I was less than enthused was an understatement.  I'd been dying to see "White Christmas" or "Rudolph" but unfortunately this lame black and white film was all there was.  Remember, back then AFN was a single station with nothing but OLD reruns and week old sporting events.  So anyways, I grabbed a pillow and hunkered down on the floor to try to make the evening pass more quickly.  Like many of you that are fans of the film I was immediately captivated by the story and characters.  I couldn't tell you what I got for Christmas that year but I do remember sitting around our little TV watching this movie with my family and coming away with such a tremendous feeling of joy. 

I know that over the years this movie has been played to excess.  I remember not long ago they played it several times a week throughout the month of December and there was such a backlash that the following years they resigned to only show it once, period!  Well most of us diehards have the DVD so we can see it as much as we want.  It's unfortunate, though, that there are so many that don't like the movie.  I think the excessive play time really ruined it for many.  It's too bad because there's an amazing message there that we all need to hear from time to time.  Regardless of all the crap that's happened to us over the years we've had a pretty amazing life.  And don't forget, YOU have been an amazing addition to the lives of so many others.  I know it's hard to see especially when you're faced with one obstacle after another and you continually see opportunity slipping away.  But life would have a little less color, a little less warmth, a little less joy if YOU were not a part of it.  You have family and friends.  You have no idea how much brighter you've made their lives just by being YOU.

It's easy this time of year to feel down.  Perhaps life hasn't played out quite the way you wanted.  But forget about the "might have been's".  Look closely.  If you stop for just a moment and think upon what you have and all that you've experienced, not only do you have a wonderful life, you ARE that wonderful life and we are all the richer because of you.

Day 354: Slow learner...

Oh yeah, it sometimes takes a while for things to sink into this old noggin. 

Yesterday was my Breck day.  Going to work on my mad snowboard skills.  Conditions were AWESOME!!!  Huge beds of fresh powder to plow through.  Oh by the way, I managed to "intentionally" get air for the first time ever on a snowboard.  First time I didn't quite stick the landing.  Picture if you will this "old gray" face planted in a pile of snow.  But the second time was flawless and if I'm not mistaken I think that was Shawn White yelling, "DUDE!!"  Ok, maybe that was just the little voice in my head.  It was such an amazing day of snowboarding. 

So, you'd think that would've been my big highlight of the day, right?  Getting air and all.  Oh no, that was just a little footnote to the real excitement of the day.  Heading up to Breck it was starting to come down, snow that is.  Conditions on the roads weren't all that bad but for whatever reason by the time I was driving into Breck my SUV decided it was time to do a little fishtailing.  Nothing too severe and nothing I couldn't steer out of.... until I got near the resort.  Going at a snails pace my lovely, not-so-little auto decided to execute a pristine 180.  Fortunately the truck in front of me saw my automotive dance and pulled out of the way as I slid right in front of him into a snow bank.  Colorful metaphors to follow, I found myself thoroughly stuck, only feet from where I needed to park.  One of the Breckenridge ski patrol guys happened to drive by in his pickup and helped pull me out.  So I only lost about 45 minutes of board time but now I had  in the back of my mind that if I had this kind of trouble GETTING to Breck, what the hell will it be like trying to go home with all this snow coming down?  Well, I'll tell ya.....

Heading home it wasn't all that bad, at least leaving Frisco and making my way all the way up to the Eisenhower tunnel.  The roads were surprising clear so I was thinking I'll make it back in one piece.  Ha, how foolish.  Out of nowhere, just before I got near Georgetown there was all this "mush" of snow covering the roads.  Really?  You guys plow every inch of this freeway and you conveniently miss a spot that's all down hill heading into Georgetown?  Well, long before things got interesting I put myself in the slow lane, shifted down and was driving slower than lose laboring trucks you see.  But just as I was thinking all will be fine since seeing about a mile ahead of me clear roads, my SUV once again decided to make my life interesting.  This time I'm talkin' SERIOUS fishtailing.  I didn't completely spin around but I managed to drift into the other lane nearly getting bulldozed by a monster 18 wheeler.  I felt surprisingly calm and once I righted the vehicle I took the exit into GT to avoid the rest of the mush on the freeway.  The roads were clear on the other side of the on ramp so once I was back on the freeway it was smooth sailing.  It wasn't until I got home that I got a wicked case of the shakes. 

So now my little life lesson, after this near death experience, is to get some frickin' snow tires!  Yeah, slap my ass and call me Betty.  I just managed to avoid the expense for the first three years we've lived here but now it's pretty much a necessity.  I tell you, if I had ANY idea back in OC when we bought the Explorer that we'd be living in Colorado I would've definitely gotten a 4x4.  Hey, I love my winter sports but sliding down a mountain in a two ton Ford toboggan isn't my idea of fun. 

Day 353: Being creative...

Ok, a show of hands, how many of you husbands have heard this from your wife, "Honey, I always wanted to get you a girl."  Anyone?  No?  Well, before you guys start jumping to conclusions let me put your deviant minds to rest.

As you may know my wife is an exceptional photographer and she's been mentoring me for as long as we've been together.  Although I'm more comfortable shooting landscapes and other non-breathing objects I do like to dabble in the artsy side of portrait photography.  Unfortunately we don't always get that chance when doing your typical family portraits.  Not many families, and especially little kids, would want to sit and pose through several hours of a photo shoot.  Usually it's your professional models who'll allow themselves to be run through the ringer in order to get "just one more shot".  When someone's paying you to take their picture, you need to be quick, efficient and more than anything else, you need to make the experience fun and engaging.  You start going beyond an hour in those family photo sessions and those smiles will turn to grimaces. 


I've always wanted an opportunity to create portraits based on what I want, not necessary that of the client.  Guess it's the difference between being a photographer and an artist.  Sorry, that sounds pretentious even as I type it.  For me my creative juices will dry up when I feel I'm forced into a type of shot rather than evolving towards one.  Well I finally got my chance to do my own thing.  A friend of Julie's has been wanting photographs taken of her tattoos and we were looking for an opportunity to focus on creating rather than producing.   Jenia is an amazing young woman and was quite the trooper as we worked through a nearly four hour session.  I still have a long ways to go when it comes to creating knock your socks off photos but today was a great learning opportunity for me.  Every time I work with my wife on these shoots I always learn something new.  It's really a wonderful experience when you can work together in an artistic collaboration to create something special.  These photos I've posted aren't the results of one person but rather three individuals bringing their creative talents together.  

Day 352: Busta' wrap MC...

If there's one thing that can harsh my Christmas buzz in no time flat it's gift wrapping.  Coming in at a close second would be the actual gift buying process.  Don't get me wrong, I love spending money on gifts for people but the whole buying and wrapping thing ranks right up there with root canals and colonoscopies.  At least with those two you get heavily medicated beforehand.  Hmm, maybe that's my problem....

Any way, so today being my first day of vacation, why not spend it wrapping presents?  I did call Kaiser first to see if they had any same day invasive surgery openings but unfortunately no so I was stuck having to "bust'a wrap" on some gifts.  My issues with gift wrapping go all the way back to my childhood.  I can remember as a kid asking my sisters to wrap my parent's gifts for me.  The price was usually serving as their slave for a week which I readily accepted.  I guess in hindsight the trade-off wasn't quite in my favor considering my gifts to my parents were usually only pencils or notepads.  If I was feeling especially generous they'd get both.  Even into my adulthood I would solicit the assistance of my daughter(s) to help with the task of wrapping gifts for their mother. At least I didn't ask them to wrap their own gifts although the thought had crossed my mind several times. 

You'd think with my penchant for detail and methodical, painstaking approach to doing most anything I'd do well with gift wrapping.  Nope, not even close.  What usually takes a normal person who has marginal eye hand coordination minutes to do, it'll take me a solid hour to wrap a single item.  And if you've seen any of my handiwork you would bet I was suffering through multiple seizures at the time.  So today was no different and as expected it kinda soured me but only for a little while.  The good-natured ribbing will certainly come Christmas day but at least I gave it the old college try.  Perhaps I should've majored in gift wrapping instead of underwater basket weaving.  Oh well, maybe next time I'll check YouTube for help.

Day 351: My work is done here...

My visit is quickly coming to an end and even though I'm beginning to feel the initial twinges of sadness I can't help but feel an incredible gladness and contentment to see how life is playing out for my Sam.  Perhaps if she were still living on her own in an apartment somewhere I'd still have those anxious feelings of wanting to help her and protect her.  But seeing the life she's made with Nick I know I have little to worry about.

It was really adorable and incredibly heart warming to see the two of them moving about the kitchen last night preparing dinner.  I don't know, over these three short days the best way I can discribe them is that they "fit".  Their banter, their laugh, the dishing of sarcasm and the genuine affection they share is all so beautifully orchestrated into this wonderful harmony.  There's an ease and comfort in the way they are with each other.  Even when they disagree they do it with an affection and mutual respect that makes it apparent there's a deep undercurrent of love they have for each other.

As our children grow up and they start loosening their grips on us and start reaching for someone else, all we can hope for as parents is that they find someone they truly love and who truly loves them back.  As I've said to Sam many times, "I just want you to be happy and no matter who you're with as long as you're happy and feel good about your life and who you are, that's all that matters."  When it comes to his daughter it's not easy for a father to step aside and let someone else become the protecter of his little angel but in this case I think my work is done here.

But I'll still be watching you....

Day 350: Sounds over silence...

My first day visiting with my Sam was spent doing what that kid does best - shopping!! I was all set to rant rave about all the shuffling and meanderings we did through the countless stores, the mind numbing indecisiveness, the asked for opinions that preceded the ignored suggestions, the "charming" sales people, the sweat box stores, the long lines and the parking that was like a game of Tetris with cars. Nope, wasn't going to get into all that. Yes, you dodged a BIG bullet there.

The horrific events that played out yesterday in a small town in Connecticut weighed heavily on my heart and mind throughout the day. All those things that would've driven me insane yesterday were just glorious reminders of how truly special my time with Samantha is. Since she was a small child we've done so much together and I can't begin to imagine a life without those memories. I think of those children who will never create their own memories and the parents who'll never know all the joys and blessings of seeing and experiencing life through their children's eyes.

I know there's nothing I can do to right this horrible wrong and it pains me, as it probably does many of you, to struggle through this sense of helplessness. But I do know that I can love a whole lot more, I can give a whole lot more, and I can show and feel gratitude SOOO much more for life's blessings that come to me through my family.

So yesterday as we sat at Red Robin having a late afternoon snack it actually warmed my heart to hear the screeching and wailing of kids bantering through topics such as not having enough fries, that someone took their crayons, or that they wanted extra cherries on their shake. I thought how wonderful to enjoy the sounds of children than to experience the agonizing silence that now grips a small Connecticut town.

For you dear children who are with us no more, be content in God's embrace, know that you will once again be reunited with your family in Heaven and that the joyful memories of you will burn bright in the hearts of your parents so in time it will help ease the suffering of missing you.

God's blessings on us all.....

Day 349: Little tikes...

I can't think of a better way to start my Christmas vacation than to be flying out to see my Sam. If only Julie and Nicole could join me.

You know, children are nothing more than God's blessings on our lives although there are times it feels more like a curse.
Even if you don't have children of your own, you were once a child yourself and were/are very much a blessing to your parents.   And contrary to popular beliefs, our parents weren't born at the age of 32. They were once crazy little kids as well, dancing on the hearts and nerves of their parents. And through the generations it has been the same, God showering mankind with little angels that occupy our hearts and souls. Lets face it, we probably haven't laughed as much or loved as much as we do with our children.

My little tike is no longer little, nor a tike.  She's all grown up, living on her own in Portland, sharing a life with THE man of her dreams. I know some of my friends have kids around 6 to 8 years old.  I know at times they'd wish they would grow up a little bit quicker, be a little more self-sufficient.  Hell, just learn how to stay off dad's last nerve would be nice.   But these times are short lived and even though it seems they are constantly under foot, before you know it you'll be starving for just a quick phone call or two. Ok, cue "Cats in the Cradle"....

I know my folks do a lot of "remember when's" about my sisters and me and I'll be honest I do a bit of that myself, especially this time of year.  We all grow up and move out, leaving our parents with memories they try desperately hard not to lose to age and time and it's the same for me now.   I've got a library full of memories of my little angel and this trip will create all new ones. I do love my little girl.

Day 348: It's as simple as that...

"Ask and it will be given to you,

seek and you will find,

knock and the door will be opened for you."

Matthew 7:7

Regardless of your spiritual orientation life really is this simple.  If there is a void in your life, if you feel there is something missing or something is lacking, you just need to go look for it and I'm here to tell you that it won't take long to find.  You need to know in your mind and in your heart that whatever you seek is there for you if you are open to the possibility.  It's too easy to feel that we have nothing to look forward to, that good fortune is for others.  If you truly feel that you'll never experience joy or any of life's rewards then you'll never experience them.  But if you are willing to accept the truth that you too can experience all the wonders life has to offer then they will certainly happen for you.  And if you're a bit in a hurry for all this great stuff to happen, then just be all those wonderful things to others.  You'll be surprised by your return on investment. 

Day 347: Shirt off my back...

For years, LONG before I was married the first time, I knew that some day I wanted a daughter.  For so many reasons but no less the fact that I wanted to see this little princess running around the house in one of my over-sized t-shirts.  With long messy hair, a Barbie in hand and one of my t-shirts that flowed like a long, cotton gown, that was my Sam.  As was typical of me, I usually set aside a collection of shirts she could wear because let's face it, kids are magnets for dirt and stains.  But my Sam being Sam, she found one of my favorites and insisted on wearing it.  Against my better judgement I conceded, which wasn't the first or last time I caved to that little angel.  I watched her settle up on the couch, wearing one of my favorite t-shirts and holding a large and very ominous bowl of chocolate ice cream.  No sooner did I say "PLEASE be careful" that a large dollop of ice cream fell from her spoon and plopped right on the shirt.  As much as I really wanted to be angry, and I might have been a little, I distinctly remember looking at that sweet, little face with that semi-sheepish grin and I knew I couldn't be angry.

Soon enough, though, they outgrow the desire to wear one of your shirts.  But since the days we started dating to the present my Julie likes to go into my drawer to pull out my t-shirts for sleeping and I can't begin to tell you have much I love that.  Something about my girl in an over-sized t-shirt is so damn adorable.  And as with my first angel, I separate my t-shirts into two stacks, the "Julie" T's and the "Please don't use these because I need them for dress shirts" T's.  On occasion there are border violations and every so often I'll find one of my good T-s with a stain or two that didn't come from me (no, I don't wear makeup).  So these days with laundry as one of my many additional duties it's not uncommon to find a shirt or two with a little stain but even though there's a little twinge of irritation, it quickly dissolves into the warmth of an "ahhhh" moment, knowing that my girl likes to wear my shirts.

So I've been fortunate to have two girls in my life who wanted to wear my t-shirts.  Perhaps one day when I'm a grandfather there might be a little tike or two that might say, "Papa John, can I wear your t-shirt?"  Ahhhhh, I can feel my heart melting already.  "Sure, sweetheart.  But NO eating ice cream!"

Day 346: Vibrant sky...

If we take a moment to gaze upon the pallet of colors that adorn our skies, it should at least remind us, no matter how dark or downtrodden our lives may seem, that we are blessed with a divine beauty so vibrant and a brilliance so immense that it casts a great light upon us, freeing us from the shadows of our lives. 

Day 345: Oh Christmas tree....

Real or fake, what's your preference?  No, I'm not talking boobs.  I'm referring to Christmas trees.  There are certainly plenty of good arguments in favor of either.  I prefer the real thing but I do sometimes envy those folks that have fake trees.  Takes all of five minutes to snap the thing together and you're done.  When it comes to tearing down it's much the same.  Couple twists and folds and it's conveniently buried in the crawl space to hibernate until next Christmas.  But with fake trees you do lose the uniqueness of a new tree each year, plus there's that natural pine smell that swirls around the house and greets you every time you walk through the door. 

I know real trees can be such a hassle.  Driving from lot to lot, trying to find a tree everyone will like.  Haggling and bartering with the tree merchants as if you were on the floor of the Stock Exchange.  Finally finding your tree and then having it mounted on top of your car hoping it doesn't fly off like a deadly projectile as you take a corner at only 25mph.  And let's not forget the sap!  I can't seem to get two pieces of paper to adhere together with Super Glue, an acetylene torch and staples but sap from a tree will cling any object to me until the top four layers of my skin have naturally worn away.  Now when it comes to getting the tree off the SUV and into the house it is definitely a one person job.  If you ever want to get the women folk out of your hair, just ask "Hey, who wants to help me bring the tree in?"  Cue the crickets.  Now once the tree is standing upright after a chorus of colorful metaphors, you will certainly find yourself surrounded by an army of the fairer sex all more than willing to help supervise your tree placement efforts.  "No wait, it's kinda leaning to one side.  There, no, wait, um, it needs to move over a couple more inches to the right.  Good, well, no, yeah, ok it was better back to the left a bit.  Ok, now it's leaning again.  You need to turn it around some, there's a big open spot.  Well, wait, that's... ok, just turn it a little more.  Alright, fine, I think.  Hmm, maybe we should've gotten the Douglas."  Ah, nothing brings out the joyful Christmas spirit more than the indecisiveness of a woman.

But in all seriousness, whether you have a real or fake tree, for me Christmas just wouldn't be the same without some kind of tree adorning your home.  The sparkling lights, the unique and somewhat eclectic ornaments really do bring out the spirit of the season.  Alright, honey, this week let's go get ourselves a nice tannenbaum.

Day 344: Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...

A VERY blustery morning.  Finally some snow here in December.  Not a lot has fallen in our neck of the woods but there's been a significant dropping up in the mountains which is pretty much where I want it.  I know I've been ranting and raving these past several weeks, whining about the lack of snow.  I really do need to take my own medicine and stop trying to control the world.  As frustrating as it might be, just allowing Mama Nature to do things in her own time is the right way to go.  I know we take this whole "free will" thing to the extreme sometimes.  We get it in our heads that not only can we make choices for ourselves but we can also make choices for others as well.  Why not?  Who has any better answers than ourselves?  I do need to work on being patient and allowing things to happen in their own measure.  As much as we want to prod our kids, the person in front of us at the checkout stand or maybe a co-worker, we do need to allow life to unfold under it's own divine plan, or at least an intelligent plan.  So I'll take what I can get and enjoy a nice, cold December morning with a few snow flakes to get me more in that Christmas mood.  Could  be a coffee, cocoa and Bailey's kind of morning. 

Day 343: Dearest friends....

Talk about getting re-energized! It was a short business trip and most definitely the highlight of this excursion was seeing Jane and Darryl. Friends from a time long ago but family for life. Contrary to what you might think our conversations don't center around memories of Heidelberg but we will share a few of those. I suspect if that's all we shared our friendship wouldn't be as enduring. No, our chats center on life's little adventures and challenges and always filled with good humor. Even the heavy topics will include a giggle or two. Don't know why. Guess that's just who we are. Or maybe it's just a defense mechanism for coping with the hard stuff. Gotta love "Brats".

So I'm heading home now and can't wait to see my Julie and Sophie. Just a few more days of work and I'm off for the rest of the year. So looking forward to the holidays and time alone with my girls. Here's hoping Jane and Darryl make it to Colorado next year. I so want them to meet Julie. But until then I'll keep them in my social media circle and more importantly my heart.

I love you guys beyond words.

PS - Dear Santa, for Christmas please give Darryl a GPS device. WAY too many left hand turns. Hey at least I got to see where Joe Biden lives.

Day 342: Looking smart, or at least trying...

It occurred to me as I was unpacking my bags last night that I failed to pack a tie.  An understandable oversight considering I "seldom" wear a suit and tie.  (In this case "seldom" equals "never").  Now when I visit my corporate offices in Boston I'll bring along a suit because as our senior leaders try to project a more informal, roll up your sleeves type of image, a suit, sans tie, is the uniform of the day.  But today I'm visiting our business development offices in Washington DC, ground zero for our great country.  Here everyone is dressed to the 9's.  Hey, our politicians and corporate whores may be driving this country into the ground but they look good doing it. 

Now what to do.  Given that I'm in Crystal City there are plenty of places one can pick up a tie, or so I thought.  After some scouting around I managed to find a suit shop that I think was a front for an al-Qaeda terror cell, but that's another story.  Wow, I gotta stop watching "Homeland".  Anyway, I kinda learned that picking out a tie is much like voting for a political candidate.  First, all the choices are horrible and those that are more popular (look better) tend to come at a great cost (more taxes, bigger price tag).  So this became a matter of choosing the least ugly (or lesser of two evils) tie.  Hopefully it won't be a distraction during my briefing.  Worst case I figured it could serve as an opening joke to help lighten the mood.  And I'm going to need all the help I can get.  It's a Friday afternoon meeting and the only thing between my audience and their weekend is me.  Damn, should've brought my juggling balls. 

Day 341: Sweatin' to the small stuff...

I know we're not suppose to sweat the small shit and everything is small shit but you do have to like those days when all those little things work out in your favor. On the way to the airport this morning I hit every green along the way. There was a parking space right up front. Surprisingly there was NO ONE at the ticket counter except several ticket agents, each beckoning me to their counter. It wasn't until I got to the Einstein's bagel stand seeing no one else in line did I begin to think I was in some Twilight Zone episode where I was the last human on earth. I'll need to make sure I don't break my reading glasses.
Not sure how the rest of this trip will turn out but for now it's looking pretty good. But even if there are hiccups during my travels I'll at least appreciate the good things that happened and not sweat the small poo along the way.
Hmmm, dare I even hope for an upgrade??

Day 340: It may be dim but there is a light...

Our lives can become a jumbled collection of details, all tightly intertwined that it weighs heavily upon us mentally, physically and spiritually.  Like the last grueling mile of a marathon, so too are these last few weeks of the year.  We may be struggling with our jobs, attending to family issues or just trying to end the year on a positive note. So much is happening around us and it seems the more we struggle to free ourselves from these burdensome shackles the more tightly bound we are by those things we can't seem to control.  But the light of hope and promise always shines through whether we see it or not.  Like getting caught in a rip tide, perhaps the best thing for us to do is to just relax and go with the flow.  Allow yourself a chance to catch your breath, find your bearings and eventually, gradually move in a new direction.  And whether you think so or not you ARE in control and whether you think so or not you ARE blazing a new and better path for yourself.  So just trust in that truth, don't feel you need to race to some arbitrary finish line and let your wonderful life unfold before you.

Day 339: Next Gen...

The Millennials are coming!  The Millennials are coming!  A generation of uber-smarties are now ensconced  in the workforce and they're here to save us from ourselves.  Yeah, whatever.

Granted there are some smart young folk out there but there's this unsubstantiated perception that the current crop of youngsters coming out of college today are brilliant beyond imagination and that our companies, hell, our country will falter if we don't embrace them, showering them with privilege just because they're really good at Halo.  Somehow it's now our responsibility to lay down the swords of discipline, responsibility, integrity, and commitment because we can't afford to burden these wunderkind with our archaic virtues.

So many industry rags are writing about how companies today need to change their way of doing business in order to attract this pool of unproven talent, for failure to do so will surely lead to their demise.  I'm not saying that doing it the old way is the best way, but I don't think summarily flushing what's worked in the past is the answer either.  I believe in and embrace change more than most.  I'm excited to see what the youngsters bring to the table but to bow down before these inexperienced kids just because they're really good with gadgets is just ridiculous.  There are even books on how to manage Millennials in the workplace.  Really?  So just telling them what their job is, what the expectations are isn't enough?  We have to concern ourselves with their fragile personalities for fear that they might scurry off like a frightened squirrel at the first sign of a confrontation.  Wow, if one of these "genius" kids gets upset because their boss tells them not to wear tattered jeans to work, I can't imagine how they would respond to an actual stressful situation.  Hey youngsters, it's not like you're saving lives here and no one is shooting at you.  But let's not forget you're the same kids that got stars for writing your name, trophies just for participating and were given a "time out" rather than actually being disciplined. 

There were a lot of smart folks that came up through the ranks long before my generation.  They entered the workforce with unparallelled ambition and desire.  They quickly learned the rules of the game, adapted and used them to their advantage in order to achieve success and over time were able to manipulate and modify them to go along with the times.  I don't recall looking back through history at a time when society bent over backwards to accommodate a group of people because of their perceived gifts but we sure seem to be doing that now.

Here's hoping the next generation will bring forth strength, resilience, dedication, responsibility and vision. 

Post Script - No animals were hurt in the writing of this blog nor was the phrase "when I was your age" ever used. 

Day 338: Another look...

When I was heading out this morning to take Sophie to doggie day care I happened to look up at just the right moment where the moon was nestled in between the Christmas lights hanging from my roof.  I won't say the view was necessarily unique but it did grab my attention so I thought I'd try my best at capturing what I saw.  A pretty fortuitous moment that only reminded me that we have many unique experiences just waiting for us to discover.  We get so busy with day to day activities, plowing through the must do's, that we miss all the little, special moments in life that would otherwise give us a sense of appreciation for seeing the little wonders in the world.  You certainly don't have to climb a mountain or jump from a plane to experience this grand world we live in although it would be kinda cool.  Just slow down a bit and allow your eyes and your mind to wander and you'll be surprised how many little miracles you'll see. 

Day 337: Just what the Doctor ordered...

It's been a pretty hectic week that moved along at a snail's pace.  The next two weeks are going to be just as busy before I'm off for the remainder of the year where I get to enjoy my family and some quiet time as well as throwing in a few days for snowboarding.  Today was a nice break to get away with my Sophie and venture out on some trails we haven't done yet.  Would've been a complete morning if my Julie was there but alas she had to work.  I've been wanting to do Gregory Canyon Trail for some time and today seemed as good as any to check it out.  Not a really difficult or long hike.  It's pretty much straight up and straight down but there are a number of outcroppings of boulders and rocks that provide a tremendous view back down the canyon towards Boulder.  And given the number of bare trees I suspect it looks absolutely gorgeous during the Fall.  Was thinking if there was anyone ambitious enough it would make for a great portrait location, at least for the outdoorsy types.  But this morning was just Sophie and me.  Nice quiet hike with only a few eagles screeching overhead.  Oh, and no bears.  Always a good thing.

Day 336: Now I can start...

It's December 1st so now I can officially get into the whole Christmas thing.  Yeah I cheated a bit listening to the All-Christmas radio station and I did manage to watch the "Charlie Brown Christmas" TV show the other night.  But today, out will come the decorations and what not.  I won't be quite the Clark Griswold but I'll have enough outdoor decorations to be somewhat respectable.  Hats off to a couple of my neighbors, though, because they really put on an amazing Christmas show in their front yards.

I guess Christmas is kind of a big deal for me.  Not so much for the chaos and angst over gift buying but more so because it brings out the child in me.  As a kid it was sensory overload with all the anticipation of excitement of Christmas as well as the mountain of gifts under the Christmas tree.  But besides the presents, I loved all the traditions.  We had so many wonderful traditions growing up - clam chowder on Christmas eve, the candied Advent calendars, making Christmas ornaments, visiting relatives (at least when we lived near by).  As I became an adult and a father it was fun to create new traditions and to see Christmas through the eyes of my daughters.  Of course as kids we were all about the gifts but as we get older it becomes more about the celebration and being with family and friends.  I have so many wonderful memories of Christmas - My first See's Candy butterscotch sucker while Christmas shopping with my grandmother.  Walking around the Christkindlmart in Munich.  There was the "tree on a swivel" Christmas.  Making Aebleskivers and drinking mimosas with my girls. And how can I forget that one Christmas in Hawaii when I was coaxed by my sisters to wake our parents up at 4:00 in the morning so we could open presents.  I can still hear them say, "Go back to BEEEEEEEEED!!!!"  Ahhh, good times.

I know this time of year can also be a little difficult.  We could be experiencing some family issues or perhaps this is the first year where a loved one is not with us.  But I think that's where traditions can help us keep the joy of Christmas in our hearts.  It's really not about the gifts. I have so few memories of any gifts I received but I have tons of memories of the joyful moments I shared with family and friends.  So off to breakfast to carbo load for the upcoming venture into the catacombs of my crawl space to dig out all the Christmas decorations.  I'll put on some Bing Crosby, set up my little nativity scene and hang my little skier ornaments and maybe watch a Christmas movie or two. Ahhhh, tradition!