Saturday, March 10, 2012

Day 70: Liars!


The picture above is the happy ending to an otherwise "screw me" story.  The so-called "simple" project of renovating the guest bathroom was anything but.  Hey, when it comes to ripping stuff out I've got mad skills.  Unfortunately my creative skills leave something to be desired.  The promises of "it'll be cheap" and "it won't take long" were all fabrications intended to drive me insane.  Congratulations, mission accomplished!

The guys on HGTV always make household projects sound idiot simple.  Their partners in crime, the evil, vest wearing killer angels of Home Depot insist the project will only take an hour, tops!  Well, two days later the project has yet to be finished.  Of course on those house repair TV shows they never show the major obstacles like the drain blog being permanently stuck in the bathtub.  Or the spout that doesn't just unscrew from the wall.  Or how about the ugly old light fixture that was concealing a rather large hole in the wall that now requires a significant amount of patching.  And don't get me started with this "measure three times, cut once". crap  Whoever came up with that needs to die a slow, agonizing death from the thousands of people who've cut and cut again just to get a stupid piece of tile to fit.

Now I'll admit, I can let things get under my skin rather easily.  And I'm notorious for throwing fits over something that doesn't work even when I've followed the instructions to a "T".  I mean, come on.  I'm one of just a few guys that actually reads the instructions and when I do and it doesn't work out as expected, it's like I've been lied to.  Someone needs to pay for this transgression against all of mankind.  As Captain Pickard once said, "... I will make them pay for what they've done!

Thank God for my beautiful wife.  She knows me so well to just give me my space.  An occasional beer, a few words of encouragement and some well timed "I love you's" made the whole experience endurable.  I don't know how she tolerates me but I'm so glad she does.

Well, the project is nearly complete and it was time to call it a day.  It was nice to join Julie in the spa and just decompress after a busy day.  Tomorrow we finish up with the bathtub and that should be it.  Here's hoping the next project goes more smoothly.

Honey, better keep the beer and the ear plugs handy.


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