Day 58: To Be or Not to Be a Runner...

As I get back into running, there are some things I've had to reacquaint myself.  Everyone knows there's a certain commitment to running.  Getting the right shoes and clothing.  Starting out gradually and ensuring you balance running with a good diet, stretching and some strength training.  That's all well and good but there are a number of prerequisites that even most running mags don't address.  So, here are some things you probably won't find in Runner's World but you should consider before you decide to add the title "runner" to your personal resume.

1. You'll hear voices (no, not the kind that tell you to build an ark).  If you're going to get into distance running (over 10K), you'll be spending a lot of time in your head.  That means you're going to have to entertain all those thoughts and feelings you have for the duration of your runs.  I personally believe that what keeps most folks from running, any distance, is that they can't deal with what's in their head.  When you first get into running the first thing you'll hear is the crescendo of voices screaming for you to stop.  All parts of your body will be bitching and moaning to your brain about the madness of this running endeavor.  Feet, shins, knees, hips, back, lungs, everyone of them will be chiming in on what a bad idea running is.  It takes awhile but eventually you'll break through that barrier and those voices will soften to a whisper.  But don't kid yourself.  They never go away, even for experienced runners.  
2. Acquiring badges of honor.  Be prepared for blisters.  That's a gimmie.  We runners always get blisters on our feet and toes.  There are some cool tricks like spreading Vaseline around your toes that will help.  But there will be some bigger issues to face.  Ankle, shin, knee or hip pain.  You can usually work through those with strength training, stretching and LOTS of ice.  Embrace the ice, love the ice.  Ice is your friend.  Now move forward in time.  You've been running for years now, logging over 1,200 miles a year.  By this time there's a good chance you'll experience the dreaded sciatica!  If you don't know what that is, imagine this.  Someone taking a hot knife, thrusting and twisting it deep in your lower back, while bolts of electricity shoot down both legs and toes.  It's all you can do to avoid falling over.  Add to that the throbbing heal spurs you've acquired over the years and you can consider yourself an Executive Platinum status runner. 
3. You'll start to equate "relaxing" to "running".  When work and home get to be a bit much, your escape will be your running shoes.  When mentally or emotionally exhausted, the normal person might want to crawl into a hot bath, light some candles and listen to Miles Davis.  Runners, on the other hand, will want to but on their running gear, dial into their favorite tunes on their iPod and sink into the rhythm of their feet hitting the pavement.
4. You'll learn you can go to the bathroom ANY WHERE.  As runners we all do our best to "blow the pipes" before we head out on a run.  For me, personally, I've been pretty successful at it but there have been a number of incidents where... uh, well, never mind.  When I plan my long distance runs I always include the logistic support that will get me through my run.  Unlike the abundant support you get from race day aid stations, your training runs are all YOU.  Back in So Cal, I established well laid out running courses that included plenty of water stops and the all important bathrooms.  And to answer the question "Does a runner shit in the woods?"  I'm hear to give an emphatic YES!  It certainly isn't the most pleasant thing I've ever done but one can't deny nature's call.  It's funny because if this situation happened to you while you were hiking or whatever, you'd be pretty miserable having to go through this, especially if you had nothing for tidying up.  But a runner, although briefly inconvenienced, will feel relieved and ready to get back on the road. 
5. It's not always sunny weather.  Expect to be cold, hot and everything in between.  The "bug" to run is not influenced by weather.  You're much like the postman - rain, snow, sleet, hail, heat, wind, etc.  Even though you'll want to think twice about going out in freezing or blazing conditions, that inner voice will still be taunting you to lace 'em up and go.  Even in the harshest conditions, a runner will find that inner peace that will actually help you appreciate your surroundings.  In any weather condition you need to prepare.  Have the right clothing, the right foods and plenty of fluids.  

Many of you might be thinking "this is NUTS!", and to some degree you're probably right.  For those of you who are already runners, this will all make sense.  But for those of you that aren't runners but for some reason kinda feel turned on by what I've said, well, you've got all the makings of a runner.  So embrace your true nature and hopefully some day our running paths will cross.  :-)